Please, Don't Swing Your Legs!

There's a wise Swahili proverb that says "ukibebwa usilevyelevye miguu." Its direct translation is: When being carried, don't swing your legs about. I guess it's because whoever is carrying you may get weary and maybe feel their efforts are not appreciated. Needless to say, the result definitely won't be beautiful.

I'd love to address one negative trait so evidence in a good number of people: Being unappreciative when hosted. It's really hard to understand why them being helped act like they don't need help? I do pray we view
this article from a positive perspective so we can all help build a generation that is ready to appreciate that is at its disposal. Not that I'm personally perfect, but I work on it every day not to disappoint the people I meet in life.

Let me begin by saying that living for each other is the true reason for living. Each of us needs some form of support at some point in life, be it emotionally, spiritually or physically. I want to narrow this topic to unwelcome behaviors and personalities witnessed in houses when people have been offered space to settle as they put their lives in order, or even being hosted for a short time during a vacation somewhere. It truly hurts especially when the host has changed his/her entire life and comfort to accommodate the very people who do some of these things.

Doing What the Romans Ain't Doing
The first thing to do when somebody has accepted to accommodate you is carefully watch their lifestyle. Some may be 'harsh' enough to draw a line on how far you can go; the "do's and don'ts". Others, and indeed most of them, shall leave you to behave. Be keen to know what time do they come home, what programs they do watch, what is their religion, if any, their dressing code, etc.

Now, what do you say of a person who decides to come at mid-night and start waking up the hosts to open the door for him? Suppose he's also drunk? What about smoking in somebody's home, knowing very well nobody smokes in that house? What if you go dressing in tight pants or short mini-skirts when the family is so clear on modesty? I know this sounds madness, but trust me it does happen.

For heaven sake one needs to behave. Yes, not everything is entirely bad. For instance if you're studying or working to late night, you may discuss with your hosts and I believe they'll understand, if they are reasonable enough.

Sometimes you may raise your standards above theirs. Purpose to do good. You don't need to do what you feel is wrong even if it's being practiced by your hosts.

Household Chores: Kill your Ego!

Now that you have joined that family (temporarily or permanent) you're part of it. That means you've a responsibility in partaking in daily keeping and maintenance of the home. This is majorly a big blow to men who're not used to household work.

The kind of present lifestyle, especially in towns, has called to everyone to do virtually every form of house work - from cooking, washing clothes, cleaning the rooms and carpets, making flower beds etc.

I can term it 'illegal' if when hosted you simply sit, wait for somebody to cook the food they've bought, serve you and then proceeds to wash the stencils. Worse still, wait for somebody to clean and arrange the your bedroom. NO! That's not right.

Remember you're not doing this as a form of payment for being hosted, neither should it be a burden to you, but rather a form of being human and appreciative to the people who've been good to you. Again, you'll be fostering your skills of living and integrating with people since you'll interact with many more people in life.

So kill your ego, force yourself, and be of help. And do it perfectly. Ask for help if you need any. There's no point in getting to the kitchen only to get out half-cooked meal. Lol.

Our "Favorites"
We all have our favorite meals. Favorite music to listen to. Favorite colors. Favorite places to go out. Favorite favorite favorite...and we're entitled to this right but not in somebody's house. You can implement your comforts when God blesses you with your own house.

Please don't make your hosts do an extra shopping to cater for your favorite meal. Always avoid complaining of the meals they provide or the colors of the building. Don't go showing you're upset by the music their children are listening. You may at times avoid watching your favorite program if it inconvenience them; may be it falls on the time they are watching their favorite program or it comes so late in the night.

Nevertheless, there is a measure of demand that you may present. For example if for medical or healthy reasons you don't take a certain meal, you may notify your host with due respect. Don't be so cold if something is affecting you. You may weigh wisely on how to handle the situation. The ultimate goal is not to add unnecessary burdens to your hosts. "Favorites" are things we can live without. Please develop self discipline and control your desires.

Destiny Connectors
I strongly believe there's a reason why people come our way; whether we're helping or being helped. That's why I highly recommend we learn to appreciate the people we meet and interact in life. We try to learn the sole role they are meant to play in our lives. We must never take them for granted. Some have entertained angels without knowing, the Bible says. It's people who will connect you to your destiny, that's why great and wise people value connections. BUT some may come to distract, be careful!

And if you're hosting a person don't make life hard. Be good and help them connect to their future. Maybe I'll do an article on why you need to be good to visitors.

Back to you: 
Do you know of any character we need to eliminate, or practice, to enhance health relations with people? Any of the above points that you've ever experienced? Please share with us your knowledge, and remember to hit the share button to reach our friends.